Accounts of adventures in the real world and inside my own mind



Accounts of adventures in the real world and inside my own mind

Thoughts on… LinkedIn


So I get an email today saying ‘Tim has endorsed you for a skill: illustrator’. Has he? That’s jolly nice of him. But I have a few questions. Firstly, who is Tim? I recognised his full name – which I’m not going to write here for security reasons – but I can’t remember where I…

Thoughts on… looking my age


At the time of writing this, I’m 23, but not everyone seems to agree with me on that. 19 – Yesterday evening I was out walking the dog and a man stopped me to compliment my waistcoat and ask where I got it from. He said he wanted them to come back into fashion and…

Thoughts on… being buried alive


I’ve thought about dying many times before. I don’t mean I’ve contemplated suicide, I mean I’ve thought about what I would do if I ever did die – not a lot I imagine. But before I die I will make sure there are things in place that will leave a little legacy and allow me…

Thoughts on… my songs


When I first started writing songs, I never really played them to anyone other than Mike. It was more to entertain myself and that’s the way it’s always been; I write for me, I write what I think is funny or clever and if someone else enjoys it then that’s great. After a few years…

At The Doctors


“What did you get for your birthday?” “A water infection.” That’s how I react to bad news, I just make a joke out of it. I’ve recently been urinating far too regularly, so this morning I went to the doctors to find out if there was something wrong. I had quite an interesting time there,…

The History of Ben’s Birthday Songs


If you’re reading this, then you’ll most likely know that I’m also somewhat of a musician. While I don’t claim to be a great singer, I do enjoy writing and recording songs. They’re often just silly little songs based around a joke, rarely meant as a serious attempt at writing a commercially successful pop song. I…

Thoughts on… stealing from Dunelm


Before we get started, I’d like to make it clear that I’m not actually endorsing the idea that you steal from Dunelm, I merely want to point out how easy it would be if one did fancy some free homeware. Last week, I bought my mother a photo frame from the Dunelm round the corner from…

The Clever Girl on the Train


We’re off to London today for Mother’s birthday. I’d decided not to bring my headphones, thinking it would waste my phone battery, so I thought I’d make an effort to have conversation with mother. Sadly, she didn’t seem to like this plan because shortly after the train departed she told me she was going to…

name my instruments

Thoughts on… naming instruments


Yesterday, I bought my colleague, Laura, a ukulele for her birthday. She loved it and decided to call it Peggy. I rather like that name, it’s a good pun for those who know about instruments (the bit you turn at the top to tune a guitar/ukulele is called a tuning peg). This got me thinking:…

Thoughts on… The Naughty Duck


When I was young, there was one character that frightened me. An animal that scared the willies out of me every time I saw it. Who was this terrifying beast I hear you ask. It was none other than… The Naughty Duck. What do you mean you’ve never heard of him? I guess I should…

My Top 12 Tweets


I’ve recently been feeling quite nostalgic/bored and so I’ve been browsing through my own Twitter feed to read back some of my tweets. Sad, I know. But be fair, there are some good ones. Quite a few I’d forgotten about and they made me laugh, so I thought what I’d do is share some of…

What happened Siren?


Had a weird experience at lunch today. I’m in Lichfield, as I’m putting a newspaper together for a company we work with. Lunchtime came and I wandered into Lichfield town centre. I’ve been to Lichfield a few times, so I know my way around a bit. I got my lunch from Subway but went into…