I have interesting dreams and I can often remember them in great detail



I have interesting dreams and I can often remember them in great detail

Since I have such crazy dreams and can often remember them, I decided to start documenting them and tagging them to see the most common things I dream about.

There are lots of dreams in my youth that I never made note of – including the earliest dream I remember in which I attended a seminar held by the Pokémon Squirtle. He came on stage and said "Hello, I'm Squirtle" and sprayed everyone with water.

I also occasionally have a recurring dream that is just me eating croutons for what feels like an hour and I also had a dream that made me terrified of Timothy Spall.

There are a few things that are consistently featured in my dreams, such as my ability to glide across the floor - either on my heels or floating slightly. So prevalent was this when I was young that I was convinced I'd done it in real life at some point.

It does sometimes become very difficult to distinguish dreams from real life. I didn't get my HND certificate because I thought I already had, but I realised a few days later that I'd actually dreamed it.

So, here are all the dreams that I've remembered...

Sutton girls and semtex


I was in Sutton and heading home from the park. I stopped off in a shop to buy some water, chocolate and giant Jammy dodgers. It was a large, open plan shop, dimly lit shop with only one girl working there. She was a polite girl, quite well spoken, with long brown hair. I put…

Chocolate croissants


I didn’t have any snacks to take with me to karate, so I went to the local shop and bought a couple of large chocolate croissants, which were cheaper than the smaller ones.

The house next door


Had a dream last night that our neighbour had moved out and mother and I had to move into her house so that somebody could move into our house. The house didn’t look like it does in real life though. The bottom floor consisted of an open plan kitchen and living room, with a spiral…

Margot Robbie’s holiday camp


I was at a holiday camp site and Margot Robbie was one of the people running it. At one point she tried to help me download the instructions for something. Later, we went out and on the way back she was walking with a guy. I was jealous, so I decided to walk back barefoot.

Simpsons graffiti


Nan and grandad announced they were getting a divorce and moving into care homes. The family was chatting about it and it was quite sad really. Later, I was in a car park with a bunch of kids. We moved a bunch of trollies so we could do graffiti on the pavement and someone started…

Laura’s experiements


Goodwin and I got a taxi back to school It stopped a bit away and we had 7 minutes to get there so we had to run I went the wrong way at first When we got there, I was hungry The canteen was putting out lunch food (potatoes, veg and Yorkshire puddings) They had…

Carrots for sale


Goodwin and I were in a bar heading to school We bumped into Matthew and Liam Matthew didn’t look to good He mentioned he’d forgotten his make up and forgotten to do his hair I joked “You May have forgotten your make up, but so has Goodwin. Next time you’re sad, think of him in…

Pussycat Dolls live at Penitentiary Hall


Watching a gif of a Pussycat Dolls concert at Penitentiary Hall They were fingering themselves on stage while singing One later said that sex was about truth and she was just being honest My old friend Josh and I went to the leisure centre He needed a wee but we couldn’t get into the gym…

The death gamble


Ed Gamble was in a new show (or might have been real life) He’d recently lost someone he’d loved And also lost his dog His mom had bought him a new dog “I know you don’t like dead dogs, so I got you a living one” Last shot was of him on a rocky edge…

Hitler FM


I was building Lego with Max Someone said I should do it as a job I quit and started building lots of Lego Someone saw me and I got a call from the BBC saying Lego wanted to speak to me Later I was in Paris Hitler was building a radio station at the bottom…

Death becomes me


Trapped in a lift with a guy In a superhero movie The villain comes flying over He takes us to Death Death is just a skeleton He steals my skin and becomes me Somehow we stopped him and I got my body back Later playing random sized super hero figures with Lee and Max Daniel…

Just over £1


Lee took me and his girlfriend Sam to KFC There was an offer on and burger and chips was only “just over £1” When we came out the car park had flooded and Sam’s car was buried People were trying to get rid of the water Lee and Sam went to get help I walked…



At work We had a big new office Matt struggled to find a video I’d done on the one drive I tried to search his computer for ‘Jetpack’ what we were now calling OneDrive While he wasn’t looking I also looked up some porn, forgetting Rosie from college was sat next to us watching She…

The purple infinity stone


Mike had been given the power of people doing what he wanted As he walked down the road, people would move out his way I could get away with not doing stuff cos I was his best friend Mike and I visited Laura and Shannon Lots of her family was there Mike rode in on…

Peter Griffin in the toilets


Peter griffin in the toilets He was going undercover as a woman His lenses fell out of his glasses A woman picked them up and gave him them Two women were in the toilets making fun of him One said he wore too much make up He made some quip back The woman looked in…

Alice and the spiders


In bed Looking at my mattress behind my bed There’s a tag on it that says Alice We had the mattress off someone and the girl who it previously belonged to was called Alice I spotted a spider on the wall I went downstairs and got a dustpan and brush I had a little sister…

Attack of the Google man


I was part of the crew on a spaceship I spent most of the time in my room We went down to earth I watched a programme about an old soap It was talking about a character called Ada Bailey who was always trying to get off with the men I told someone how Rimmer…



Me, Mike, Lee Mack and Goodwin were going on holiday We had to catch a train A guy working at the station recognised me from last year He took me outside and showed me he’d written my name on a green postbox (which was already covered in names) I took some photos and got Mike…

The gaming expo


My friend Nadine and I were going to a gaming expo We walked down the road, then crossed over and started walking back down I asked why Nadine said we’d passed the place I asked “Why not just walk back?” she said “We’re going back round in a circle.” Before we crossed the busy road,…

Super Uncle


I became a super hero Dressed in blue and gold My brother Lee and I had to try and get a lamb, a cow and a chicken We got them I heard my nephew Max calling me I tracked down the bad guys and interrogated them They couldn’t feel pain Max and grandad were in…

Batwoman’s ukuleles


I was in a supermarket looking for a few things The staff were all on blue tops They were playing a big game around the shop where they had to avoid each other It was somehow related to die hard -I knew the last person to survive would be Bruce Willis’ character I teamed up…