Slight inconvenience is the best revenge

There was a big party going on in the centre of the town. I was in a back yard playing ball with an older Max. He wasn’t very happy, as I’d told him not to do something and he said I sounded like his dad.

We then heard a bit noise from down the road. A bunch of army guys had landed and were rounding up a group of men. Even though they’d found the people they wanted, everyone else still panicked and hid.

I ran to the town hall where the main event was taking place. In the back, the orchestra was playing (I’m Gonna Be) 500 Miles as quietly as they could – except for one guy who started singing loudly.

I found mother and asked her where my dad was. In this dream I had a dad and he was a captain in the navy. She didn’t know where he was, but a young man told us that my dad been in a car crash but he was okay. I was still upset and got really angry, as if he’d actually died.

Mother calmed me down and then told me my dad also cheated on her, but she was going to sort it out.

Mother found the house of the woman who he’d cheated on her with and told me she was going to beat up the woman inside. When we got there, she picked the lock on the door and opened it. She turned on the hallway light, but then got scared and started backing out of the door. I told her she needed to go inside but mother kept making excuses why she couldn’t do it.

We heard the woman inside coming out into the hall, so we legged it. I ran off down the wrong road but saw mother and ran over to her.

“So she sleeps with dad and your revenge is to slightly inconvenience her?” I asked.
“Pretty much,” she replied.

We ran to the docks and she said she’d find the sea captain who would help her hide until the woman calmed down.

At this point, mother was now Marge Simpson and the Sea Captain was the one from the Simpsons. He let her on his little boat, which was more like a raft that they had to hold onto while in the water. They headed out to sea to Antarctica, which was only a few minutes away. As they swam, Marge tried to make conversation.

“Thank you so much for doing this.”
“Arr, I’m just glad someone wants to go to Antarctica.”
“This is a lovely boat you’ve got.”
“Aye, a boat made of crap.”
“I think it looks nice.”
“It’s made of crap and takes one pile of crap over to another pile of crap every day.”
“Jeez Louise, just take the compliment.”

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