I play the ukulele, piano and guitar... and I write my own songs



I play the ukulele, piano and guitar... and I write my own songs

The Elephant in the Room


I was sitting strumming on the guitar and thought it sounded quite nice, but I didn’t have any ideas for lyrics. I looked through my old notes and came across an idea for a song about talking to the metaphorical elephant in the room and asking him to leave. I thought this was a neat…

So Sweet


I was listening to Lenka whilst at work and my boss pointed out how ‘sweet’ her music was, saying “It’s like the musical equivalent of eating candy floss.” This gave me an idea for a song about someone who’s so sweet that it could actually be bad for your health to be with her.

The Boy Don’t Dance


I came up with this song while I was playing my pocket ukulele in Bulgaria. The song is somewhat autobiographical. I’ve never been one for dancing and I usually do end up sat in the corner on my own. I don’t mind though. The only time I’ve really danced was at a Molotov Jukebox gig.…

Just a Song


I came up with some really nice music and couldn’t think of any lyrics, so I wrote a song about being unable to write a song… as you do.

Blitzen the Acrophobic Reindeer


Every year I try and write a Christmas song and this year I got to thinking… there’s quite a few songs about Rudolph and how he overcame his struggle with having a bright red nose. But what about the other reindeer? What if they had their own issues that we don’t know about?

I Must Be Psychic


A song celebrating the good, honest work that psychic mediums do and the vital role that the dead play in giving us cryptic clues about who they are.



I don’t often write songs that are autobiographical or deal with feelings and emotions, but I started writing this a couple of years ago when I was going through depression. I was very down and didn’t know what I was doing with my life or where my life was going. I came up with the…

I Want to Grate Cheese (parody)


A parody of I Want to Break Free by Queen. I don’t actually like cheese all that much, but it seemed like a fun parody to do. And once I’d got the idea of a little Freddie Mercury and Brian May made out of cheese in my head, I couldn’t resist making a video to…



I’ve been listening to Johnny Cash a lot recently and found myself strumming along on the guitar and wanting to write a song in a similar style. I was noodling on the guitar and came up with the riff. I started strumming and didn’t have a clue what I was going to write about, but…

My Wife’s A Looney


This song was inspired by a song called ‘She’ by dodie. The song includes lines about what the singer’s love interest smells like and reminds them of. And it got me thinking: what if they reminded you of something ridiculous… like a cartoon character. So here’s a fun little love song with some questionable impressions.…

Vote Gary!


In January 2014, Mike and I saw a leaflet about a local Conservative campaigner, Gary Sambrook. We half-jokingly decided to support him and I wrote a little song which we sent to Gary. Within days, we were in the Daily Mail, on BBC Radio WM and even featured in BBC1’s Sunday Morning Politics. The song…

Meant To Be


A song about falling for someone with whom you have absolutely nothing in common with, so you find really contrived things to pretend you have in common with them. Not that I’d ever do that of course!